Myth 1 – If there is no weapon or “physical abuse”, then a person has not been raped.

Rape doesn’t have to involve weapons or beatings.  Intimidation, threats, and manipulation are also used in rape and sexual assault.  Wearing your partner down until they give up and have sex with you because you will not leave them alone is also rape.  No means no, no matter when, where, how, or why it is said.

Myth 2 – Most rapes are committed by strangers.

85-90% of the time, the victim knows the person who raped them.  50% of all rapes take place in the victim’s home.

Myth 3 – Sexual assault means only means rape.

While sexual assault does include rape, it also includes incest, statutory rape, sexual contact, and sexual harassment.

Myth 4 – Immediately after a rape, the victim in usually hysterical.

It is important to remember that every victim reacts differently.  You can never be sure as to how someone will react.  While some people may become hysterical, others may be calm, emotionally absent, uncaring, and/or scared.  Any way that a victim reacts is normal.

Myth 5 – Men are never raped.

1 in every 5-6 boys will be sexually assaulted by the time they are 18 years old.  Males can be sexually assaulted by either men or women.

Myth 6 – Rape is a crime of passion.

Rape is an act of violence.  It is about power and control, having power and control over someone else.  Rape is not a crime of passion.

Myth 7 – It is okay to expect someone to have sex with you under certain circumstances.  For example, That person led you on, she/he said yes and then changes their mind, you have spent a lot of money on them.

It is never okay to expect someone to have sex with you.  Having sex is a personal choice that is up to no one but you. No one has the right to expect to have sex with you no matter what they have or have not done and no matter what you have or have not done.

Myth 8 – Victims are young, attractive women in their 20’s and 30’s.

Rape victims are any age.  In Connecticut, the youngest victim of sexual assault is 3 months of age and the oldest victim is 90 years of age.  Rape is not about how someone looks.  Rape is about power and control.

Myth 9 – If you are raped, always submit, never fight back physically.

Everyone reacts to rape differently.  There is no right or wrong way to react.  A person in that situation should do whatever it is that they need to do to survive.  Whether that is submitting or fighting back is up to them.

Myth 10 – If you carry a weapon, you will be protected from sexual assault.

You are never able to be 100% sure.  The attacker could take your weapon away.  Your weapon could be used against you.

Myth 11 – If a person hitchhikes, goes out alone after dark, dresses or acts sexy, they are asking to be raped.

No one asks to be raped or forced into having sex.

Myth 12 – Most young people who are sexually assaulted tell someone.

Most young people do not tell anyone when they are sexually assaulted.  Young people feel embarrassed, scared, alone, and are afraid that no one will believe them.

Myth 13 – Rape is often falsely reported to the police.

Rape is committed more frequently and reported less that any violent crime in the U.S.  Less than 15% of rapes are reported to the police.  78 rapes occur every hour in the United States.  Rapes are underreported because the victims may feel ashamed and somewhat responsible for what has happened.

Myth 14 – Demeaning comments and/or telling sexual jokes about someone is not a form of violence.

Sexual jokes and demeaning comments are a form of sexual violence.  They are sexual harassment.  Sexual harassment is illegal in the United States and you can be prosecuted for committing it.

Myth 15 – It isn’t important to report crimes of sexual assault.

It is important to report crimes of sexual assault to the police.  This can help prevent others from being victims of sexual assault by this person.  It can also aid in the healing process, by assisting the victim in realizing that the attack was a crime.